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Friday, September 4, 2009

7 Quick Takes


1) Some guy, who writes for some magazine that used to be famous, is astonished--astonished, I say!--that people think there are communists in the Obama administration! I don't know whatever could have given them that impression. Aside from the government takeover of banks, and car makers, and their relentless efforts to take over the health care industry. And the fact that they have a "pay czar" who has authority over how much private business executives get paid. And the administration's affinity for communist dictators. Oh, and there's that guy who publicly proclaimed that he's a communist. Other than that, though, I don't know what people are thinking. Buncha' right-wing crazies.

Really, I'm glad that the word "communist" is still considered an insult. We'll see how long that lasts.

2) Next month, I'm going on a mission trip with my church.  Our team of six will be spending a week in a remote mountain village in Ecuador. Not only is it my first trip to South America, it's my first ever serious camping trip. Except for the missions aspect (God wants us to spread his love around the world and junk like that), nothing about about the trip interests me. The more I study up on camping, the more I know I'm going to hate it. Why? Because I have a house. And a bed. And central air.  Why would anyone reject all that to sleep outside on the ground and poop in the woods?

Friends have asked me to go on camping trips before, and I said, "Won't you get cold at night?" They replied, "It's no problem. I've got a zero degree sleeping bag." And I said, "Well, I've got a 72 degree bedroom. You enjoy yours and I'll enjoy mine."

3) When I was growing up, Steve Martin was a goofy guy in a white suit with an arrow through his head, and very few people knew that he was a flat-out great banjo player. Now I think more people know him for banjo playing than for stand-up. That, my friends, is a renaissance man.



4) Every year since she was a kid, my wife has been interviewed by someone from the Department of Labor for the purpose of gathering statistics. Seriously, someone from the DoL actually came to her house and interviewed her. This will be the first interview since we've been married, so I will do my best to observe and report back what actually goes on, and if I possibly can, screw up the survey results. "Department of Labor statistics report that 30% of Alabama households consume more than 9 pounds of bacon a day, and have working nuclear reactors in their basements."

5) Punctuality.  Let me pause here to give a shout out to Bobo Pest Control, a representative from which is currently inspecting my house.  I've had the guys from Bobo come by several times, and not only do they get here when they say they will, they're usually early.  It's so unheard of, I don't know how to deal with it.

Bobo: Ok, we'll be there at 9:00.

Me: You mean, sometime between 9 and 5?

Bobo: No. At 9.

Me: You mean, sometime on the 9th? Sometime in the 24 hour period that makes up the 9th of the month.

Bobo: No. 9.

Me: You mean sometime during the year 2009?

If they offered cable TV or plumbing services, I'd hire them to do that too.

6) We don't have termites, by the way.  We were just renewing the termite bond, in case there's anybody out there who maybe, possibly, somehow, could conceivably be interesting buying my house.

7) And finally, we could always use a little dramatic chipmunk:



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